I have big babies, there is no doubt about that.  The first few months with Cameryn, I was all sunshine and rainbows about my newborn.  Babies are cute, right?  What could someone say about my super cute baby?  And then, I learned to put on my armor when leaving the house, to go full on mama mode.  I learned to expect to hear comments from strangers, or even people that I knew, at Target or Walmart about the size of my baby.  I found out, the hard way, that people have no filter when it comes to babies and because it is a baby they think they have a free pass when talking about them.  "Look at the size of her!  What is your Mommy feeding you?  You're a big girl!" 

I was met with the same criticism at daycare from a parent whose children are sitting right next to mine.  Yesterday, I ran into daycare to pick up Jordin, and I really was running because I wanted to see Shana, whose baby just started there this week.  Her six week old is so damn cute but I rarely see her because our schedules are so different.  I am holding Lakyn while Shana and another parent, who is standing there with her child, are talking.  After a few minutes, I hand Lakyn back to Shana, and pick up Jordin.

And then this happens:

"OMG!  She's so big!  How old is she?" says the mom that I have never laid eyes on until today.
"Almost four months."
"She is almost four months?  My child is eight months and not that big.  WOW.  Big baby." 

Then she gives me The Look.  You know, the one where you know you are being judged.  She cut her eyes at me, she raised her eyebrows, and she made that sound that is half-sigh and half-disgust through her nose. 

"How long does she sleep at night?"
"About 8 hours."
"Right, she (pointing to her child), doesn't do that because she isn't that big."
Shana cut in, "Lakyn sleeps eight hours and she isn't that big either."
"Oh."

And then I turned my back and started talking to the teacher.  There was so much that I wanted to say, that I could have said.  You know like, "Yes, my child is big.  And so are you.  You look like Amazon woman.  Your feet could be mistaken for Big Foot."  But I didn't.  Because those words wouldn't be acceptable to say to a parent or a child.  No one should have to feel as if their child isn't good enough.  Damn Mommy Wars.  They need to stop.

Body image.  The past two weeks it has been in the headlines almost every single day.  Gaga. Katie. Demi. Stacy London.  Every single one of them has battled an eating disorder.  We are told to, and we strive to, teach our children to love their bodies to respect them, that they are good enough.  Yet, at every doctor's appointment they are compared to other children their age and given a percentage of where they stand, and in turn, parents get so caught up in this percentage.  The cycle continues because we let it.

We don't talk about being fat or ugly in our house.  We talk about being healthy and why eating healthy food and exercising is good for our body.  It is what works for us in our house.  I try and I try and I try to set the example for my children and the world around me wants to break me down, break my girls down. 

I will not let it.   

We didn't have any plans for the weekend.  I needed to clean our house after having company last week.  Chris was working Saturday and Sunday, so it was just Cam and I.

Or so I thought.

Cameryn and I got up at 6:30 on Saturday and played until 7:30 when she wanted to wake up Chris.  Chris got up and was sitting on the couch drinking his coffee.  Cameryn and I went into the office because she wanted to do her ABC's online (Fisher Price website!)  About 15 minutes later I heard a loud BOOM! and then an "Oh!"  I called out to Chris and asked if he was okay.  No answer.  I called again.  No answer.  I got up from the chair, running into the living room while Cameryn trailed behind me.  My heart dropped into my stomach, Chris was face first on the floor.  Coffee was spilled everywhere.  His glasses had fallen off and were bent.  "Chris!  Are you okay?"  He looked up at me and was totally disoriented.  Cameryn, obviously sensing that something was wrong had started crying.  Chris tried to get up, but I made him just sit there while I figured out what the heck just happened.   He said that he doesn't remember getting up off the couch or walking towards the kitchen.  He walked 5-6 steps towards the kitchen and fell face first, between Cameryn's toy box and the coffee table.  He does have a red mark on his head, he obviously hit it somewhere, and rug burn on his knee, but otherwise he is/was okay.  He sat on the couch with Cameryn while I cleaned the carpet.  I asked him if he had ever done that before, he said no.  I asked him if he wanted to go to the doctor, he said no.  This was not the answer that I wanted to hear.  This wasn't a normal occurrence for him, so obviously something was wrong.  I asked him to call his mom (because I knew he would listen to her) and she recommended that we go to the doctor.  He ate while I dressed Cameryn and off we went.  We waited for an hour or so before he was finally seen.  His sugar was low, even after his meal, but otherwise he was fine.  His EKG and vitals all came back normal.  They sent off his blood work to check his insulin levels and we should have that back in a few days.  We are wondering if he is hypoglycemic as it runs in his family.  He didn't go to work on Saturday, thank goodness, and we had a lazy Saturday.  I cooked chili and we watched the SEC Championship game.

Chris did go to work on Sunday, he said that he is feeling fine.  I have asked him to try and eat something every few hours to keep his sugar levels up.  He did eat a snack in the morning, but didn't after lunch.  I have set a reminder on my calendar at work to text him every 3 hours to eat.  I don't want to find him face first in the ground again!